Over the years, I have been trying to promote a healthier culture of masculinity. As gender and culture evolve, so do the norms and expectations of men. As always, manhood faces pressures and scrutiny and I welcome this process. We must evolve but we can evolve with principles that can withstand the storms of life. I am not interested in throwing out the best qualities of manhood just because someone says manhood = toxicity. Nor do I waver under the fear that manhood is perishing under some conspiratorial threat.
Below are some concepts on which my beliefs about manhood are based and they form the foundation of Men's Soul Counselling Service. Should these beliefs become criticized I will stand by them. Should they cause anyone harm, I will remain open to change. I believe these principles to be relevant in any era or place.
Voila, I give you the Ten Principles of Good Manhood brought to you by Men's Soul:
A man is responsible for his attitude.
Adversity is inevitable and gives life meaning.
Overcoming adversity can be accomplished by working on our own attitude.
Blaming and bullying are contrary to manliness.
Good masculinity is guided by principles, not popularity.
Every man has unrealized strength and potential.
Developed strengths can overcome insecurities and trauma.
Strength is most admired when seasoned with humility.
Strengths can occur physically or through intelligence and character.
Strengths can be put to good use in the service of others.
This may be a place to clear up some lingering misconceptions about the promotion of masculinity, and I will do so by comparing it to common fallacies about the word "jihad".
"Jihad" is a Muslim concept that is often falsely condemned as being an outward war on the enemies of Islam. Taken in that way, this may have something to do with "lesser jihad" which may involve an outward fight against injustice, but even this concept when properly understood is not meant to be destructive. The principles outlined above are very much in congruence with "greater jihad" which is a struggle to make oneself a better person, to avoid that which is not life-giving, to purify our hearts and to do good. This has nothing to do with taking religious sides or building allegiances based on similarity of political outlook.
In the same way, the brand of masculinity Men's Soul promotes is the betterment of oneself and others based on principles of higher good. These principals are not derived from a single religious or historical tradition of any kind-- it is my intention to base them on principles that are self-evident to anyone who strives for what is best for himself and others in any time and place. It is not based on the belittlement of particular groups to enhance the position of men, nor is it founded on a belief that men's qualities must be abandoned as "outdated."
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